Everybody deals with adversity in different ways. In truth, everybody’s definition of adversity is different. Challenges that some might regard as life-shattering, may appear as mere speed humps to others. None of us knows when (or where) our ‘wheels’ might come off, and in the event that they do, we are then forced to create our own custom remedies; a voyage of personal discovery that can often be painful but ultimately rewarding.

Perth H.O.G.^™ member, Matt Hales, is proud of his current fix, but getting his life back on track has not come without a heap of soul-searching, some significant life changes and – by his own admission – a fair few tears.

Originally from Palmerston North on New Zealand’s North Island, Matt signed up as a plant operator with the Royal New Zealand Engineers soon after leaving school. He enjoyed the army life and made a stack of lifelong mates, but with the arrival of his first daughter Shontae, he opted for a life out of uniform.

Like his dad and brothers, Matt was a handy rugby league player; narrowly missing out on a trial with Sydney ARL team the Balmain Tigers. He also maintained an active passion for mixed martial arts that he carried through to competition level on one occasion.

From the outside at least, life appeared to be going well. Keen to carve a better life for his family, Matt moved his family to Queensland’s Gold Coast where he would work in the civil construction industry. Shortly after the move, came the arrival of his second daughter Aliyah and he would also pick up the Steeden again and play rugby league at a high level for a number of Gold Coast feeder clubs.

On the inside, things weren’t going so smoothly. “I struggled on so many levels wrestling with my mental health, being hospitalised three times and eventually being diagnosed with Bipolar disorder in 2003. My anxiety was through the roof and my relationship was failing as I searched for the path that would lead to a better life,” he says.

A few years later, believing that they needed another fresh start, Matt looked to the Western Australia mining industry as a lucrative escape route. However, the cracks in his home life were getting harder to hide. “I know now that I was running away from the reality of my relationship issues and hoping that money would fix them,” he says.

Things would eventually hit rock bottom when, on his birthday, his partner of 20 years left him and their daughters for another man. “I was at an all-time low but knew I had to stay strong for my two girls.”

It would take a year for Matt to feel strong enough to date again but he hit the jackpot when he met his future wife Treza at Paddy’s Bar in Kalgoorlie. “We shared wine with our meal along with some great conversation, and then she introduced me to Gentleman Jack’s. It was love at first sight and the rest is history,” he recalls.

With life feeling more positive, Matt took on a job with Fortescue; a new environment that would prove to be a huge boost to Matt’s recovery.

Supported by the Fortescue chaplaincy team, and under the guidance of Fortescue Group Chaplain, David Bradbury, Matt was able to properly face his demons. So much so that after two years studying whilst working full time he accepted a role as a Fortescue chaplain in August 2021.

Treza was also a huge support and together they presented on the Fortescue Mental Health Roadshow in 2019. “Treza empowered me to find the strength within and not allow my struggles to define me. I found myself again and in time we travelled the Pilbara region of Australia speaking at mine sites and raising awareness around mental health and suicide,” Matt explains.

One of Treza’s roadshow stories relates to when Matt was still recovering. Regardless of his condition, he was adamant that he was going to buy a Harley-Davidson Fat Boy. A dream that didn’t account for the fact that he had no money and didn’t even have a licence!

Eventually, Matt would realise his Harley^® dream, buying his brand-new Fat Boy (22FBOY) in January this year. It’s everything that he hoped it would be. “Initially, I loved the name, but looks are important too,” he says. “I love that big fat wheel on the back and the fact that I can make heaps of noise and look cool at the same time!”

His Fatboy helps him unwind too. “As Chaplains, we are custodians of stories,” he explains. “We hold other people’s experiences as sacred and confidential.” And, while Matt regards his position as a huge privilege, he explains that you need ways to release the emotions that have been triggered when someone’s story crosses with your own.

Each individual will have their own mechanisms to facilitate this release and riding his Fat Boy has become one of Matt’s happy places. “Going for a ride is simply one of the most joyful things. When I’m on my bike I feel so connected,” he says. “Your senses come alive. You can just smell nature in the air and feel the breeze. On a beautiful day, nothing beats it.”

 

What to do if Matt’s story has struck a chord. If you or someone you know are seeking mental health info or qualified support, please reach out to the people at Beyond Blue; Lifeline Crisis Support or Mental Health New Zealand.